combed the whole of vivo. i hate weekends partially due to the overwhelming crowd. i make it rather different this season. most of the malls extended their shopping hours so i indulged in that as well. it never felt so much better to have do more bags at the end of day. nothing's enough. the only moment we rest was for dinner and foot reflex. i guess i strained my legs for all the heels i'm putting. i didnt know i am taking sucha toll to my poor legs. oh wellsss.. fulfiling trip~

the reasons i gave for 'comforting' myself the moment i stepped into the mall was, this crowd will go away in a couple of hours time because

1) Zouk Out = attract thousands there
2) Tampines Ikea = never ending people strolling in even early hours
3) End-of-year = travelling seasons!

speaking about Zouk Out, i did mention i might be going in my previous entry. i was somewhat touched that a few were trying to 'search' for me. sadly, i didnt attend but thanks for the tiny effort (: i didnt thought in any ways my entries were fascinating and i've removed the link. there's no tag box or leave-down-a-comment because i dont find it a need. some things are better left unsaid.

i've seen countless people in and out of my life way too much. conversation with jon. like what vincent said, women will panic when they still left on the shelves when they hit 25. he actually make a point which i totally agreed because woman's body worked liked her age. jon can get the fact to me that i can stop being picky and keep myself guarded but again, why should i get involved and open up to tom, dick or harry. its so not CJ. yes.. i might be only be eighteen for now, but not for long. i dont know why people around me are rather anxious and concern about my private relationship but i always have a stand deep down inside me, i will not have to utter those special words or initiate moves. what's mine will be mine gradually. i could run and hide from that one, he'll still be by my side somehow. that's what i call destiny. what i believe in.

jon was agitated by what i said but its my point. marriage is not love at the end of the hour. its the 'getting used' to each other. 10 years down the road, you wake up not finding your other half beside you, dine with you or breathing down yor neck and that's when you searched high and low and screamed the word miss because you feel empty. thought about car/house loans and credit card bills and little dolls running round. this is no pessimistic, its realistic. of course, there're happily-ever-after as well darling. like a companion who walked you through life to your very last breath and hand-in-hand with the sunset as the background and said no regrets. i hold a strong faith i will walked down the aisle with the man whom i passionately love and hold dearly to my heart, endure and enjoy every single moment of our life together and that's when i say 'I Do'. so for now my flen, dont you worry about me and this shall ease your mind (: